Sixth Notebook – Paragraphs 1751-1760
1751. + O Jesus, concealed in the Blessed Sacrament of the Altar, my only love and mercy, I commend to You all the needs of my body and soul. You can help me, because You are Mercy itself. In You lies all my hope.
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J. M. J. Cracow-Pradnik, June 2, 1938
1752. Under the direction of Master Jesus, who Himself commanded me to make this retreat, and who selected the days on which I was to make it; namely, the three days preceding Pentecost and who, Himself, conducted this retreat.
However, I asked my confessor [probably Father Andrasz] whether I could make such a retreat, and I received his permission. I also asked Mother Superior [Irene] and received her permission too. I had resolved that I would not make the retreat unless I obtained the permission of the Superiors. I began a novena to the Holy Spirit, and waited for Mother Superior’s answer.
I should be beginning the retreat today, but I have not yet received new of Mother Superior’s decision.
When I went to Church for the evening devotions, I saw the Lord Jesus during the litany. My daughter, we are beginning the retreat. I answered, “Jesus, my dearest Master, I ask Your forgiveness, but I cannot make the retreat, because I have received no news as to whether Mother Superior allows it or not.” Do not worry, My daughter, the Superior has given her permission. You will learn of it tomorrow morning. But we are to start the retreat today.
And indeed, Mother Superior had telephoned that evening to the sister who is looking after me during my illness [Sister David], asking her to tell me that I was allowed to make the retreat, but the sister had forgotten to tell me. It was only next morning that she told me, and she was very apologetic that she had not told me the day before. I answered her, “Please do not worry. I have already started my retreat, according to the Superior’s wish.”
+ The First Day.
1753. In the evening, Jesus gave me the subject for meditation. At the first moment, my heart was filled with fear and joy. Then I pressed myself close to His Heart, and the fear vanished; only joy remained. I felt entirely like a child of God, and the Lord said to me, Fear nothing. What has been forbidden to others has been given to you. The graces that are not given to other souls to discern, not even from a distance, nourish you every day, like the daily bread.
1754. Consider, My daughter, Who it is to whom your heart is so closely united by the vows. Before I made the world, I loved you with the love your heart is experiencing today and, throughout the centuries, My love will never change.
1755. Application. At the very thought of Him to whom my heart is wedded, my soul entered into profound recollection, and the hour passed like a minute. In this state of recollection, I came to know the attributes of God. Burning with an inner fire of love, I went out to the garden to cool off; when I looked up at the heavens, a new flame of love flooded my heart.
1756. Then I heard the words: My daughter, have you exhausted the subject I gave you? If so, I’ll give you a new one. I answered, “O Infinite Majesty, eternity will not be enough for me to come to know You But my love for You has become more intense. As a token of gratitude, I lay my heart at Your feet, like a rosebud. May its fragrance delight Your Divine Heart, now and for eternity…. What a paradise it is for a soul when the heart knows itself to be so loved by God …”
1757. Today, you will read chapter fifteen of the Gospel of Saint John. I want you to read it very slowly.
1758. My daughter, consider the life of God which is found in the Church for the salvation and the sanctification of your soul. Consider the use that you make of these treasures of grace, of these efforts of My love.
1759. Application: O most compassionate Jesus, I have not always known how to profit from these priceless gifts, because I have paid too little attention to the gift itself and too much to the vessel in which You were giving me Your gifts. My most sweet Master, it will be different from now on. I will put Your gifts to the best use of which my soul is capable. Living faith will support me. Whatever the form might be, under which You send me Your grace, I will accept it as coming directly from You, without considering the vessel in which You send it. If it will not always be within my power to accept it with joy, I will always accept it with submission to Your holy will.
Conference on Spiritual Warfare.
1760. My daughter, I want to teach you about spiritual warfare. Never trust in yourself, but abandon yourself totally to My will. In desolation, darkness and various doubts, have recourse to Me and to your spiritual director. He will always answer you in My name. Do not bargain with any temptation; lock yourself immediately in My Heart and, at the first opportunity, reveal the temptation to the confessor. Put your self-love in the last place, so that it does not taint your deeds. Bear with yourself with great patience. Do not neglect interior mortifications. Always justify to yourself the opinions of your superiors and of your confessor. Shun murmurers like a plague. Let all act as they like; you are to act as I want you to.
Observe the rule as faithfully as you can. If someone causes you trouble, think what good you can do for the person who caused you to suffer. Do not pour out your feelings. Be silent when you are rebuked. Do not ask everyone’s opinion, but only the opinion of your confessor; be as frank and simple as a child with him. Do not become discouraged by ingratitude. Do not examine with curiosity the roads down which I lead you. When boredom and discouragement beat against your heart, run away from yourself and hide in My heart. Do not fear struggle; courage itself often intimidates temptations, and they dare not attack us.
Always fight with the deep conviction that I am with you. Do not be guided by feeling, because it is not always under your control; but all merit lies in the will. Always depend upon your superiors, even in the smallest things. I will not delude you with prospects of peace and consolations; on the contrary, prepare for great battles. Know that you are now on a great stage where all heaven and earth are watching you. Fight like a knight, so that I can reward you. Do not be unduly fearful, because you are not alone.