Fifth Notebook – Paragraphs 1581-1589
1581. O my Jesus, my Master, I unite my desires to the desires that You had on the cross: I desire to fulfill Your holy will; I desire the conversion of souls; I desire that Your mercy be adored; I desire that the triumph of the Church be hastened; I desire the Feast of Mercy to be celebrated all over the world; I desire sanctity for priests; I desire that there be a saint in our Congregation; I desire that our whole Congregation have a great spirit of zeal for the glory of God and for the salvation of souls; I desire that souls who live in our homes do not offend God, but persevere in good; I desire that the blessing of God descend upon my parents and my whole family; I desire that God give special light to my spiritual directors, and in particular to Father An. And Father So.; I desire a special blessing for Superiors (note234) under whose direction I have been, and in particular for Mother General [Michael], for Mother Irene and for the Directress of Novices, Mother [Mary] Joseph.
1582. O my Jesus, I now embrace the whole world and ask You for mercy for it. When You tell me, 0 God, that it is enough, that Your holy will has been completely accomplished, then, my Savior, in union with You, I will commit my soul into the hands of the Heavenly Father, full of trust in Your unfathomable mercy. And when I stand at the foot of Your throne, the first hymn that I will sing will be one to Your mercy. Poor earth, I will not forget you. Although I feel that I will be immediately drowned in God as in an ocean of happiness, that will not be an obstacle to my returning to earth to encourage souls and incite them to trust in God’s mercy. Indeed, this immersion in God will give me the possibility of boundless action.
1583. As I write this, I hear Satan grinding his teeth. He cannot stand God’s mercy, and keeps banging things in my cell. But I feel so much of God’s power within me that it does not even bother me that the enemy of our salvation gets angry, and I quietly keep on writing.
1584. O inconceivable goodness of God, which shields us at every step, may Your mercy be praised without cease. That You became a brother to humans, not to angels, is a miracle of the unfathomable mystery of Your mercy. All our trust is in You, our first-born Brother, Jesus Christ, true God and true Man. My heart flutters with joy to see how good God is to us wretched and ungrateful people. And as a proof of His love, He gives us the incomprehensible gift of Himself in the person of His Son. Throughout all eternity we shall never exhaust that mystery of love. O mankind, why do you think so little about God being truly among us? O Lamb of God, I do not know what to admire in You first: Your gentleness, Your hidden life, the emptying of Yourself for the sake of man, or the constant miracle of Your mercy, which transforms souls and raises them up to eternal life. Although You are hidden in this way, Your omnipotence is more manifest here than in the creation of man. Though the omnipotence of Your mercy is at work in the justification of the sinner, yet Your action is gentle and hidden.
1585. A vision of the Mother of God. In the midst of a great brilliance, I saw the Mother of God clothed in a white gown, girt about with a golden cincture; and there were tiny stars, also of gold, over the whole garment, and chevron-shaped sleeves lined with gold,. Her cloak was sky-blue, lightly thrown over the shoulders. A transparent veil was delicately drawn over her head, while her flowing hair was set off beautifully by a golden crown which terminated in little crosses. On Her left arm She held the Child Jesus. A Blessed Mother of this type I had not yet seen. Then She looked at me kindly and said: I am the Mother of God of Priests (note235) At that, She lowered Jesus from her arm to the ground, raised Her right hand heavenward and said: O God, bless Poland, bless priests. Then She addressed me once again: Tell the priests what you have seen. I resolved that at the first opportunity [I would have] of seeing Father [Andrasz] I would tell; but on my own, I can’t understand anything regarding this apparition.
1586. O my Jesus, You see how very grateful I am to Father Sopocko, who has advanced Your work so much. That soul, so humble, has had to endure all the storms. He has not allowed himself to become discouraged by adversities, but has faithfully responded to the call of God.
1587. + One of the sisters was appointed to look after the sick, but she was so negligent that one had to practice real mortification. One day, I made up my mind to tell the Superior about it, but then I heard a voice in my soul: Bear it patiently; someone else will tell her. But the service was like that for a whole month. When I was finally able to come down to the refectory and to recreation, I heard these words in my soul: Now other sisters are going to tell about that sister’s negligent service, but you are to keep silent and not speak about the matter. And at that point there broke out sharp criticism of the sister, but she could find nothing [to say] in her own defense, and all the sisters said in chorus, “Sister, you had better improve in your care of the sick.” I have found that sometimes the Lord does not want us to say something on our own; He has His ways and knows when to speak out.
1588. Today I heard the words: In the Old Covenant I sent prophets wielding thunderbolts to My People. Today I am sending you with My mercy to the people of the whole world. I do not want to punish aching mankind, but I desire to heal it, pressing it to My Merciful Heart. I use punishment when they themselves force Me to do so; My hand is reluctant to take hold of the sword of justice. Before the Day of Justice I am sending the Day of Mercy. I replied, “O my Jesus, speak to souls Yourself, because my words are insignificant.”
The Soul’s Expectation of the Coming of the Lord
1589. I do not know, O Lord, at what hour You will come.
And so I keep constant watch and listen
As Your chosen bride,
Knowing that You like to come unexpected,
Yet, a pure heart will sense You from afar, O Lord.
I wait for You, Lord, in calm and silence,
With great longing in my heart
And with invincible desire.
I feel that my love for You is changing into fire,
And that it will rise up to heaven like a flame at life’s end,
And then all my wishes will be fulfilled.
Come then, at last, my most sweet Lord
And take my thirsting heart
There, to Your home in the lofty regions of heaven,
Where Your eternal life perdures.
Life on this earth is but an agony,
As my heart feels it is created for the heights.
For it the lowlands of this life hold no interest,
For my homeland is in heaven – this I firmly believe.
[End of Notebook Five]