First Notebook – Paragraphs 451-460
451. Once after Holy Communion, I heard these words: You are Our dwelling place. At that moment, I felt in my soul the presence of the Holy Trinity, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. I felt that I was the temple of God. I felt I was a child of the Father. I cannot explain all this, but the spirit understands it well. O Infinite Goodness, how low You stoop to Your miserable creature!
452. If only souls would become recollected, God would speak to them at once, for dissipation drowns out the world of the Lord.
453. On one occasion, the Lord said to me, Why are you fearful and why do you tremble when you are united to Me? I am displeased when a soul yields to vain terrors. Who will dare to touch you when you are with Me? Most dear to Me is the soul that strongly believes in My goodness and has complete trust in Me. I heap My confidence upon it and give it all it asks.
454. Once, the Lord said to me, My daughter, take the graces that others spurn; take as many as you can carry. At that moment, my soul was inundated with the love of God. I feel that I am united with the Lord so closely that I cannot find words to express that union; in this state I suddenly feel that all the things God has, all the goods and treasures, are mine, although I set little store by them, for He alone is enough for me. In Him I see my everything: without Him – nothing.
I look for no happiness beyond my own interior where God dwells. I rejoice that God dwells within me; here I abide with Him unendingly; it is here that my greatest intimacy with Him exists; here I dwell with Him in safety; here is a place not probed by the human eye. The Blessed Virgin encourages me to commune with God in this way.
455. When some suffering afflicts me, it no longer causes me any bitterness, nor do great consolations carry me away. I am filled with the peace and equanimity that flow from the knowledge of the truth. How can living surrounded by unfriendly hearts do me any harm when I enjoy full happiness within my soul? Or, how can having kind hearts around me help me when I do not have God within me? When God dwells within me, who can harm me?
J.M.J. Vilnius, August 12, 1935
456. On the evening of the introductory day of the retreat, as I listened to the points for the meditation, I heard these words: During this retreat I will speak to you through the mouth of this priest to strengthen you and assure you of the truth of the words which I address to you in the depths of your soul. Although this is a retreat for all the sisters, I have you especially in mind, as I want to strengthen you and make you fearless in the midst of all the adversities which lie ahead. Therefore, listen intently to his words and meditate upon them in the depths of your soul.
457. Oh, how astonished I was, for everything the father said about union with God and the obstacles to this union I had experienced literally in my soul and heard from Jesus, who speaks to me in the depths of my soul. Perfection consists in this close union with God.
458. During the ten-o’clock meditation, Father [Rzyczkowski (note98)] spoke about divine mercy and about God’s goodness to us. He said that as we review the history of mankind, we can see this great goodness of God at every step. All the attributes of God, such as omnipotence and wisdom, serve to reveal to us the greatest of His attributes; namely, His goodness. God’s goodness is the greatest of God’s attributes. Many souls striving for perfection, however, are not aware of this great goodness of God. Everything that Father said in the course of the meditation about the goodness of God, was exactly what Jesus had said to me concerning the Feast of Mercy. I have now come to understand clearly what the Lord has promised me, and I have no doubt about anything; God’s language is clear and distinct.
459. Throughout that entire meditation I saw the Lord Jesus on the altar, in a white garment, His hand holding the notebook in which I write these things. Throughout the entire meditation Jesus kept turning the pages of the notebook and remained silent; however, my heart could not bear the fire that was enkindled in my soul. Despite the great effort of my will to take control of myself and not let others see what was going on in my soul, toward the end of the meditation I felt that I was completely beyond my own control. Then Jesus said to me, You have not written everything in the notebook about My goodness towards humankind; I desire that you omit nothing; I desire that your heart be firmly grounded in total peace.
460. O Jesus, my heart stops beating when I think of all You are doing for me! I am amazed at You, Lord, that You would stoop so low to my wretched soul! What inconceivable means You take to convince me!