Third Notebook – Paragraphs 1121-1130
1121. May 6, , The Ascension of Our Lord
Since early this morning, my soul has been touched by God. After Holy Communion, I communed for a while with the heavenly Father. My soul was drawn into the glowing center of love. I understood that no exterior works could stand comparison with pure love of God I saw the joy of the Incarnate Word, and I was immersed in the Divine Trinity. When I came to myself, longing filled my soul, and I yearned to be united with God. Such tremendous love for the heavenly Father enveloped me that I call this day an uninterrupted ecstasy of love. The whole universe seemed to me like a tiny drop in comparison with God. There is no greater happiness than when God gives me to know interiorly that every beat of my heart is pleasing to Him, and when He shows me that He loves me in a special way. This strong inner conviction, by which God assures me of His love for me and of how much my soul pleases Him, brings deep peace to my soul. Throughout this day, I was unable to take any food; I felt gratified to the full with love.
1122. God of great mercy, who deigned to send us Your only-begotten Son as the greatest proof of Your fathomless love and mercy, You do not reject sinners; but in Your boundless mercy You have opened for them also Your treasures, treasures from which they can draw abundantly, not only justification, but also all the sanctity that a soul can attain. Father of great mercy, I desire that all hearts turn with confidence to Your infinite mercy. No one will be justified before You if he is not accompanied by Your unfathomable mercy. When You reveal the mystery of Your mercy to us, there will not be enough of eternity to properly thank You for it.
1123. Oh, how sweet it is to have in the depth of one’s soul that which the Church tells us we must believe. When my soul is immersed in love, I solve the most intricate questions clearly and quickly. Only love is able to cross over precipices and mountain peaks. Love, once again, love.
1124. + 12 [May 1937], A strange darkness sometimes invades my intellect. I am submerged in nothingness against my will.
1125. May 20, 1937. When for a whole month I had been enjoying good health, it occurred to me that I did not know which was more pleasing to the Lord – my serving Him in illness or in the robust health for which I had asked Him – and I said to the Lord, “Jesus, do with me as You please,” and Jesus returned me to my previous condition.
1126. Oh, how sweet it is to live in a convent among sisters, but I must not forget that these angels are in human bodies.
1127. On one occasion, I saw Satan hurrying about and looking for someone among the sisters, but he could find no one. I felt an interior inspiration to command him in the Name of God to confess to me what he was looking for among the sisters. And he confessed, though unwillingly, “I am looking for idle souls [cf. Si. 33:28; Pr. 12:11].” When I commanded him again in the Name of God to tell me to which souls in religious life he has the easiest access, he said, again unwillingly, “To lazy and idle souls.” I took note of the fact that, at present, there were no such souls in this house. Let the toiling and tired souls rejoice.
1128. 28 May 22, 1937. The heat is so intense today that it is difficult to bear. We are all thirsting for rain, and still it does not come. For several days the sky has been overcast, but there is no rain. When I looked at the plants, thirsting for the rain I was moved with pity, and I decided to say the chaplet until the Lord would send us rain. Before supper, the sky covered over with clouds, and a heavy rain fell on the earth. I had been saying this prayer without interruption for three hours. And the Lord let me know that everything can be obtained by means of this prayer.
[May] 23. The Feast of the Most Holy Trinity
1129. During Holy Mass, I found myself suddenly united with the Most Holy Trinity. I recognized His majesty and greatness. I was united to the Three Persons. And once I was united to One of these Most Venerable Persons, I was, at the same time, united to the other Two Persons. The joy and happiness that my soul felt is beyond description. It grieves me that I am unable to put down in words that which has no words.
1130. I heard these words: Tell the Superior General to count on you as the most faithful daughter in the Order. (note195)